Vidders Anonymous
by mryddinwilt
Summary: Captain Swan, modern AU. Emma and Killian are Youtubers who discover each other through their Youtube channels. Some long distance misunderstandings, angst, and eventual IRL meeting. There is even a lovely playlist to listen to while you read! Now Complete.
1. Chapter 1

**There is a Youtube playlist you can listen to that goes with this fic. Listen at youtube dot com slash playlist?list= PLWN8Uu8V5RChvSaDEQglOmBy_l1hkfnm8** (remove any spaces)

There are days Emma regrets deciding to get a Masters in Criminology; today is one of them.

She stares at her white screen the blinking cursor mocking her. It's not that she doesn't know what to say about rape culture in the media. It's that she has so much to say she doesn't quite know where to start. She sighs and looks around her quiet corner of the library. As she contemplates the size of a volume on maritime history a new song begins on the Youtube playlist she had started almost an hour ago. There is a pause and then a single chord on a piano. Then a deep, rich, voice starts "My romance doesn't have to have a moon in the sky"

She feels a thrum in her veins and she can't help flipping her screen from her word processor to first thing she notices is his smile. It's framed by dark scruff and dimples. He looks up and into the camera and Emma can't help the way her stomach flips a little. His sapphire eyes sparkle at her through the screen. Talented, attractive and sings Ella Fitzgerald; a dangerous combination Emma thinks before allowing herself a small smile. She clicks into his channel. His screen name is K. Jones, he has a handful of followers and a couple dozen videos. She spends a few long minutes staring at his profile photo before mentally shaking herself. The last thing she needs is to start crushing on some random, gorgeous, musician. But, she reasons, his music is good and the whole reason she listens to Youtube playlists is to discover new artists. She clicks on his "Covers" playlist but then forces herself to switch back to her paper.

Miraculously as his rich voice pours into her ears inspiration strikes. Emma's fingers begin to fly and she finally has more than a title and an outline. He is a talented musician with varied taste. His songs bounce from old standards to new hits. With every video Emma finds herself eventually switching the screen to watch him. She notices that he doesn't have a high tech set-up. Just him on a couch with a guitar or at a piano. He is probably just using his laptops webcam. His clothes are always casual, t-shirts that show off his spectacular arms and jeans on just the right side of form fitting.

The latest song starts with tapping on his guitar, followed by some energetic strumming. She taps her foot and hums along.

"If you can't hear what I'm trying to say." His voice is velvet soft and wraps around the lyrics. "Maybe I'm going blind. Maybe I'm out of my mind."

Emma can't help bobbing her head, her fingers taping words in time with the music. She feels a vague recognition at the melody and lyrics but can't place it until

"…take a good girl."

"No!" Emma actually whispers when the realization hits her. She flips back to her browser and the image of him strumming his guitar.

"I know you want it." He looks into the camera again with a smirk and Emma's stomach twists but this time it is in repulsion. She rips her headphones out of her ears in disgust. Her eyes catch the title of the video "Blurred Lines- Acoustic Cover" She feels a sense of betrayal. That this anonymous, attractive, musician had tricked her into enjoying, even for a moment, the most disgusting song of the last decade. It feels like just one more confirmation of the lesson Neal taught her over a year ago. Men, even Youtube musicians, can't be trusted.

She looks around. She needs someone to rant to, to share her outrage with but she is alone. That had been the point of going to the library to be alone and undistracted by roommates and their antics. Finding nobody to vent to she turns back to the screen. "K. Jones" is still singing but she can't hear the words, can only see his stupidly attractive face. The fact that she is attracted to him only boils her blood more.

The Youtube comment box asks her to "share her thoughts" and so she does. She dislikes the video with a vicious click and closes the tab. Returning to her paper with a new determination. She listens to her Pandora for the rest of the day.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

It's been a long night for Killian Jones. Tending bar in between sets on the stage had seemed like such a good idea at the time. But tonight it had been too much, the crowd too rowdy, the music not flowing the way he wanted. He arrives in the flat that he shares with his brother completely knackered and collapses on the couch with a sigh. His hands itch to pull his guitar out and lose himself in some mindless playing. But Liam is asleep and needs to get up early for his shift. He could risk it, but last time Liam had handcuffed him to the radiator as punishment. The joys of having a police officer for a brother.

After a few moments of internal debate Killian sighs and grabs his laptop. He heads first to Facebook, mindlessly scrolling for awhile. Then he decides to check Youtube, hoping some nice comments on his videos might help him feel a little better

Getting a YouTube channel had been Jefferson's idea. One night drinking in the pub he had argued the merits rather convincingly. "Why not? It doesn't cost anything and the potential pay off is huge. If Justin Beiber got discovered on YouTube why not you?"

He had a point. When Killian started to look into it he realized that there were a lot of "youtubers" that had managed to create decent to gigantic fan bases just making simple videos. Killian knew he was just as talented and hard working and he got excited at the prospect of having thousands of subscribers or going viral. So he created a channel and recorded a video of one of his more popular songs. And then he waited for the likes and the view count to go up. They didn't. Sure Liam, Jefferson, and Smee all watched it. They probably showed it to a few friends. But the video only got about 50 views in the first few weeks (and he knew 25 of those were probably just him checking the video).

Killian didn't give up. He kept uploading. He googled "how to get views on youtube" and did research into how others had found success. This was when he had started doing covers of popular songs. It was an easy way for people to discover you in a search. Plus if they liked your cover they might buy it and maybe even listen to your original songs. It had worked. He began to get more views and some actual subscribers. He liked to think that it helped that his covers tended to be re-inventions of the originals or mash-ups with lesser known or older songs. Lots of people seemed to love his fresh take and he had been steadily growing his following. Sure he only had about 300 subscribers but it was a start.

With the subscribers had come comments on his videos. He was surprised at how much he enjoyed hearing feedback. He tried to reply back to everyone, it was good form. He hoped that people appreciated hearing from him and he liked connecting with them. After a night like tonight he needed an ego boost. Unfortunately the first thing to appear was anything but complimentary. It was a comment on a very old video, a guitar cover of "Blurred Lines".

"People like you make me sick. Singing a song that is the definition of rape culture and attempting to make it sound sexy is five kinds of disgusting. I might have become a fan if your choice in music wasn't so appalling. Real musicians are in it for the music not the fame and meaningless sex."

Killian's eyes narrow as he reads the comment. It is to well written for a simple troll. This is a genuinely pissed off individual. He looks at the user. It is an unhelpful blue silhouette with the word "Swan" next to it. He clicks into the profile but it is an empty shell with no videos, activity, or an about. This "Swan" is an internet ghost. He clenches his jaw in frustration and closes the laptop. Roughly replacing it on the coffee table and stalking to his room.

He could perhaps forgive their frustration with his song choice. It wasn't his favorite either but it had been wildly popular and that cover had gotten him more than a few new subscribers. But to imply that he wants to be a musician for the groupies and the fame really angers him. Perhaps because it reminds him so much of Milah. He was a musician because he couldn't imagine being anything else. Because he lived and breathed music and because if he didn't write or play he would go mad with the unrealized melodies in his brain. This Swan didn't know him but their rude opinion haunts him for the next few days.

When he responds to the comment almost a week later he attaches a link to a new video. This one recorded just for Swan.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Emma curls her legs underneath her, sighing as she struggles to pay attention to the movie. After a long week of classes Emma and her roommates were all staying in; bingeing on junk food and movies. Elsa had picked first and, predictably, it was a Jane Austen movie. Emma didn't really go for all the lace and suppressed passion. She was an action movie person and couldn't wait until this drivel was over so she could watch Mission Impossible. She struggles through a few more scenes. When the Kiera Knightly character begins sassing off to the tall, rich guy she drags her laptop to her knees.

"Emma! You have to watch!" Elsa protests.

"I've seen this before! They hate each other and then they love each other. It's ridiculous."

"Emma Swan this is the greatest love story of all time!" Elsa cries. "What are you doing?"

"Just checking Youtube."

Anna plops down on the couch with a bowl of ice cream. "Ugh! Emma! That's like doing work!"

"No work!" Mary Margaret calls from the kitchen.

Emma shakes her head. "No. I am not on my Ugly Duckling channel. I am on my personal account. So it's not work!"

Emma is happy that she can flip her laptop and show them her screen as proof. Although she had been considering looking through her channel stats only moments before. She was so close to half a million subscribers and it was exciting to watch the numbers climb higher. One good resonating video was sure to push her over the milestone.

"You have a separate account? Isn't that like cheating? I mean don't your subscribers like to track what videos you like and comment on?" Anna speaks through a mouthful of mint chocolate chip.

Emma sighs. "That's kind of the point. I don't want people knowing EVERYTHING about my life."

Emma had never planned on becoming famous on YouTube, never planned on making it a quasi-career, it had just happened. She had started her sophomore year of college when some of her dorm mates had expressed interest in learning self-defense. Emma had made a video describing a basic technique, created an account called "Ugly Duckling" (an inside joke amongst her friends) and uploaded it. Overnight she had over fifty people asking for her to upload more. Turned out that there were a lot of college coeds wanting to learn how to gouge a man's eyes out. Then she started getting questions which had led to her talking into a camera about all sorts of topics. Her outspoken nature and insistence on not sugar coating anything had gained her a lot of subscribers. It had also attracted a lot of hate but the trolls had only fueled her determination and given her ideas for more videos. When she started to really get famous Emma had created a second account to avoid the scrutiny of her fans and her trolls.

"What's that?" Anna gestures at the screen with her spoon.

"Just a notification. Someone responding to a comment I left."

"Who is K. Jones?"

A flash of dark hair and blue eyes enters Emma's mind as she clicks on the comment. His "Blurred Lines" video comes up.

"Ugh." Emma pauses the video before it can play more than a few notes.

"Oh. He's cute!" Anna squeals.

"Let me see." Elsa gets up from the floor and leans over the back of the couch to get a look. Emma ignores the image of his smug face and focuses on his response to her comment.

"Apologies for having caused offense. Perhaps you will enjoy this video?"

Emma smiles a little, pleased at his penitent reply. She looks back at his face, frozen in a sly grin, before clicking the link. While the page loads she turns to Anna and Elsa, the movie all but forgotten as they gather round the laptop.

"He is just a musician that I called out for singing Blurred Lines."

"Oh Emma! You can't just berate random people on the internet!" Elsa exclaims as a short ad begin to play. Anna reachs over to switch the player to full screen.

"Clearly you haven't been on the internet enough. Besides it's a horrible song! And he wasn't upset. He made me an apology video!" Emma tries to ignore the way heat rushes to her cheeks at his thoughtfulness. The ad finishes and Emma turns to the screen.

The video opens on the same couch but Emma can tell that he has invested in a better camera. Unlike his other videos he doesn't start playing right away. He smiles into the camera; all flashing teeth and sex appeal.

"This video is dedicated to Swan. Because they understand my true motivations" Emma is surprised at the distinctly British lilt to his voice. "I hope you like it." He winks and flashes another smile before beginning to strum his guitar.

"Emma! A hot, British dude just dedicated a song to you!' Anna bounces in her excitement. Emma can't stop herself from grinning back. Then he starts singing.

"I'm the next flight that you get on, international"

Emma feels her heart sink. The guitar continues to pick the familiar tune (it's one of Anna's favorite songs). She shakes her head in disgust at his sly, grinning face.

"First class seat on your lap…" Emma slams her laptop shut.

"Hey! I was watching that!" Anna protests.

"Anna that is a disgusting and degrading song."

"I love that song!. And he has a great voice and he is drop dead gorgeous." Anna reaches for the laptop but Emma pulls it away.

"Don't you get it? He picked that song to taunt me. It's not an apology at all!"

Elsa rolls her eyes. "Don't be so prickly Emma. I think it's clever."

Emma pushes herself off the couch with a huff and goes to the kitchen for some ice cream.

"What's wrong!" Mary Margaret asks as Emma yanks open the fridge.

"Nothing. Just a stupid, cocky, son of a bitch that happens to be able to sing." '

"Ok." Mary Margaret replies before exiting the kitchen; doing her best to avoid getting caught in the drama. Emma barely notices her mind is already churning, trying to come up with an appropriate revenge. She hears his rich voice floating from her laptop speakers. She hates the way it slides over the lyrics with a slight growl. Hates the way her foot almost starts to tap. When the chorus starts she grits her teeth.

"All I really need to understand is when you talk dirty to me."

-/\/\/\/\/\/\/\-

**Authors Note: Hey look my first Modern AU! This was written for Tumblr's Captain Swan Secret Santa for BelovedCreation (she is over on Archive of Our Own and you should read her stuff! It's fantastic!) This should have two or three more chapters. So follow to see what happens! **


	2. Chapter 2

**The Playlist has been updated for this chapter listen at youtube dot com slash playlist?list= PLWN8Uu8V5RChvSaDEQglOmBy_l1hkfnm8  
>Rating is still T but there is a bit of strong language in this one.<strong>

/\\\\/\\\\\/\\\\

After posting the link to his new video Killian pays extra attention to his comment feed. The anticipation of seeing Swan's response almost killing him. After almost a week he gives up hope and is a little disappointed that he didn't get the satisfaction of seeing more outrage. For the next few days work and songwriting consume his time and he doesn't get the chance to check his channel. When he finally jumps on to upload his latest video he does a double take. "3,587 subscribers" is blazoned on the top of his screen.

"That can't be right." he mutters.

"What's that little brother?" Liam asks as he enters the room.

"Nothing. It's just my Youtube channel. I've gained over three thousand new subscribers in the last couple days."

"Seriously? How did that happen?"

"I don't know." Killian runs his hand through his hair and continues clicking through his profile. " Scratch that. These followers are from the last couple HOURS! I have five hundred new comments!"

Liam chuckles at the near panic in Killian's voice. "Those will take all night to answer."

Killian nods but clicks into the comments anyway. They are all on his "Blurred Line's" video, which now also has a ridiculous number of views. He scans a few quickly.

"Ugly Duckling brought me here!"

"I agree with everything Ugly Duckling said but I can't stop watching your videos!"

"he is what I call 'adorable sexy' and talented!"

"thanks Ugly Duckling for ruining my life"

"Who is Ugly Duckling?" Liam asks as he leans over the back of the couch, reading some of the comments.

Killian shakes his head in shock. "She's that American lass. Remember she does those self-defense videos?"

"The one you have a crush on?" Liam asks with a wink before jumping over the back of the couch and landing on the cushions beside him.

Killian flushes; he was hoping his brother wouldn't remember. It was true that after he discovered Ugly Duckling five months ago he had watched every video that she had made. He had learned that her name was Emma, that she had grown up in foster care, that she wanted to be a detective, and a hundred other personal tidbits. It was true that he found her attractive and intelligent and fiery and kind and just bloody brilliant. It was also true that he had never met her in real life and had never imagined she would acknowledge his existence.

"It's not a crush brother. I don't even know her. I just like her videos." Killian avoids making eye contact.

Liam rolls his eyes "Sure brother. Remind me again what the fuss is about?"

Killian types "ugly duckling pinky" into the search bar. After a few seconds the results populate. The video he wants is at the top. "Here. Watch this." The video starts with Emma talking into the camera. She is stunning; bright green eyes, an adorable smattering of freckles, and a mischievous tilt to her mouth.

"Hey guys. Welcome to another installment of "Easy Self-Defense". Today I am going to show you a simple trick to breaking a grip. Remember if things get hinky, It's all about the pinky" She smiles a wicked smile and Killian grins because he knows she is about to inflict some pain. "Neal here is going to help me out." The camera zooms out and a brown haired guy with a scruffy goatee walks out from behind the camera. He waves uncomfortably. Neal was Emma's boyfriend and used to appear very regularly in her videos. Although Killian had happily noted that he had disappeared in the last year. She walks up to Neal and the demonstration begins. The Jones brothers watch as she explains how to twist and yank a pinky to inflict maximum damage. Like all her videos it is hilarious and informative. They both laugh out loud as Neal winces and yelps in mock pain and Emma huffs and rolls her eyes at his squirming. At the end she returns to the camera, summarizing the technique with a grin before signing off.

"Thanks for watching! And don't forget to thank Neal in the comments for being such a wonderful attacker." The screen goes black before flooding with suggested videos, all of them featuring her face.

"A tough lass." Liam remarks.

"Aye. And she has half a million subscribers."

"Click on her profile." Killian complies and her latest video begins to play automatically.

"Hey Ducklings! Today I want to talk about music and rape culture. Specifically I want to talk about the responsibility of all musicians, no matter how small their audience, to not participate in horrible media misogyny." Kilian's breath catches. "Take a look at this video" a link appears and Killian knows without clicking that it is a link to his video. "But don't bother if you would rather not watch a moderately attractive guy singing a mediocre cover of a horrible song." He knows it shouldn't hurt, he doesn't even know her, not really. But it feels like a trusted friend has just ripped him apart.

"Click the link" Liam urges. Killian shakes his head so Liam reaches over and clicks for him. His "Blurred Lines" cover opens in a new tab. Liam starts to laugh and Killian fights the urge to punch him in the face. He shoves him instead.

"It's not funny!" He turns on the couch to face his brother's sparkling eyes and flashing teeth.

"Oh but it is. Don't you see? She linked to your video so she could embarrass you but instead you gained thousands of subscribers in just a few hours!"

Killian sees the irony but somehow it doesn't make him feel better. All the subscribers in the world can't make up for the wound to his ego. Killian runs his hand through his hair.

Liam shakes his head. Knowing what Killian is thinking ."Try and look on the bright side brother. This lass has introduced you to a large audience. Who cares what she thinks?"

"Yeah. You're right. This is a good thing." Killian nods and tries to sound convincing. Liam claps him on the back and heads to the kitchen. Killian closes the laptop and picks up his guitar. Losing himself in the music and trying to take Liam's advice.

But he can't let it go because he does care what she thinks. He opens the laptop up and watches the rest of the Ugly Duckling video. She is merciless in her assessment of musicians that promote rape culture and misogyny. She never specifically mentions him after providing the link and denouncing the song. But Killian can't help but feel like the entire video is a personal attack on him. An attack that he feels is completely unjustified. She doesn't know anything about him. Her conclusions are completely inaccurate and clearly based on nothing but her hatred for that blasted song. Killian is beginning to wish he had never recorded the blasted thing. He watches the video a third time his frustration growing. He shuts his laptop again and stalks silently to his room to get ready for work.

Liam watches all this agitation thoughtfully and with more than a little of his own anger. His little brother had been through enough in life without some random American bird making him feel like shit. As soon as Killian leaves for the night Liam settles on the couch. He opens the laptop and begins to browse through Killian's "Unposted Videos" folder. Shaking his head a little at the insane organization of his little brother. It doesn't take long before the title of a file catches his attention.

/\/\/\/\/\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

Spring used to be Emma's favorite season. This year it was quickly becoming her least. It used to make her think of love and beginnings. This year it reminds her of Neal and endings. Plus it doesn't help that as the warm weather hits there are suddenly couples every where. Couples that can't keep their hands off each other. Emma knows they aren't intentionally trying to rub their happiness in her face. They are just enjoying the weather and their significant others. But her own hand feels cold and empty and she tries not to think about the last time she was properly kissed. It's not that she really wants to start dating again, she isn't ready. She is still a little too broken to risk trusting someone with her heart. So even though she is perfectly content to be alone she can't help but feel annoyed at the couple laying in the grass, arms wrapped around each other.

"Get a room." she mutters as she passes them. Her phone buzzes and she is grateful for the distraction.

It is a Snapchat from Anna. Texting is too limiting for the excitable redhead, she needs to express things with outrageous facial expressions. Emma taps her screen to reveal Anna's bulging eyes and perfectly rounded mouth with the caption: "OMG! He responded!"

"What?" Emma says aloud and shakes her head. She is only a few minutes from home and decides to wait and let Anna fill her in on the details in person. She is barely through the door when Anna yells from the couch.

"Did you see it? Please tell me you haven't seen it yet! I want to see the look on your face."

Emma puts down her keys and hangs up her bag. "See what?"

"His video!"

"What video? What is going on?" Emma moves into the kitchen her stomach reminding her it was lunch time.

Anna sighs and rolls her eyes and follows Emma into the kitchen.

"The video! You posted a video. You ranted about music and rape culture"

Emma nods pulling meat and condiments from the fridge. "I posted that this morning. And it wasn't a rant, it was a well thought out critique."

"Yeah. Sure it was. I mean you didn't make it because you were angry or sexually frustrated or anything. It's not like you specifically called someone out. I mean you linked Killian's video but you weren't like attacking him personally as pay back or anything-"

Emma raises her hand to stop Anna. "Killian? His name is Killian?"

"Uh-huh. He lives in England and he was in a band but now he is solo. His covers are fantastic and he even writes original songs-"

"You read his about page? Wait. Anna did you subscribe to his channel?"

Anna doesn't even have the good sense to look sheepish. "Of course I did! He's hot, he's British, and he can sing." She lifts up her fingers as she ticks off her reasons.

"What about Kris?" Emma asks referencing Anna's long time boyfriend.

"Oh he subscribed too! He says he likes his guitar skills."

Emma groans. The last thing she wants is for her friends to become fans of this guy.

"Don't be upset. If I hadn't subscribed than you wouldn't know that he has already posted a response to your video!"

Emma looks up as she finishes making her sandwich and fixes Anna with a stare. "You aren't going to stop until I watch it are you?"

Anna grins mischievously. Emma sighs. "Go get your laptop." She sits down at the counter and chews thoughtfully as Anna rushes off to the other room. This Killian certainly acted quickly and she was curious what he might say. She doesn't think he could have any possible defense and she is almost dreading hearing his arguments. She determines not to respond to his video, no matter what he says. He has already taken up too much of her time.

Anna rushes back in and sets the laptop down. The video is already cued up. The screen paused on Killian's face. This time the camera is set up in his bedroom. His hair is almost wild, like he has been running his hands through it for hours, and his eyes look haggard. Anna starts the video. He looks into the camera dejectedly as his hands rest on the piano keys. Emma feels a flash of pity. Had she done this to him? She looks at Anna but she doesn't seem to have noticed anything off about his appearance.

He begins to sing and it is so low and heartbroken that Emma catches her breath.

"I see you driving 'round town with the girl I love and I'm like, "FUCK YOU!" " The original version of this song is light and catchy but he has brought the tempo down and turned it into something sad and dark. He isn't smiling or winking into the camera, he is giving his whole soul to the song.

"And although there's pain in my chest I still wish you the best With a..."FUCK YOU!""

This is a song about rejection and Emma knows it is personal. Knows because she has felt the same, when Neal walked out on her without a word, without any explanation. She would have played this version of the song on repeat a year ago. She had been so full of anger and self-loathing; unable to focus on anything but how much she hated Neal. He ends the song with a final "FUCK YOU!" and a sneer into the camera.

"Well?" Anna asks.

Emma shakes her head, coming back to the present. "Well what?"

"Emmmmaaaaa! The guy literally just told you to fuck off! In a song. Aren't you like angry?"

"Do you want me to be angry?" Emma took a bite out of her sandwich.

"Yes! Well no! I mean…I thought maybe this was the start of a grudge match. Like now you do a video about how only the unintelligent resort to cursing. And then he could do a song with lots of cursing and then you could do a video…."

Anna trails off as Emma shakes her head. She swallows and takes a sip of juice.

"I am not doing that."

"But why? That video is incredibly rude and angry. And actually a little bit hot. Don't tell Kris I said that. "

"That song wasn't for me."

"Emma. It says in the description. 'For Ugly Duckling'."

"Ya. Well maybe he posted it for me. But he didn't sing it about me."

Anna spends a few more minutes trying to convince Emma that she should make a scathing response but Emma flatly refuses. She finishes eating and excuses herself. Once in her room she flings herself on her bed and stares at the ceiling. His pain filled voice and shining blue eyes haunt her thoughts. Knowing that there were other broken people in the world-and she had no doubt that Killian had been broken by someone- was somehow soothing. That everyone wasn't wrapped in the bliss of Spring fueled kissing was a relief. She feels a little less self conscious about her own scars. She pulls out her phone and watches the video again, the volume low so Anna won't hear.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\\/

"LIAM!" Killian's voice jolts Liam from sleep. He sits up, his training taking hold, and jumps groggily from bed. He meets Killian in the doorway of his bedroom. "YOU BLOODY WANKER!" Killian bellows. Liam takes a step back, unsure what he has done to incur such wrath. Killian rears back and punches him hard in the jaw. Liam stumbles back onto his bed.

"Wha…"

"STAY OFF MY BLOODY LAPTOP!" Killian turns and slams the door behind him. Liam knows better than to chase after him. He lays back on his bed and rubs his hand over his face. He had only been trying to help, to protect his little brother. It looked like he had failed.

He checks on Killian in the morning but the stench of stale rum and his loud snores tell him it will be impossible to talk now. Liam leaves him some water and pain killers on his bedstand. When he returns home that afternoon Killian is in the kitchen, his blood shot eyes staring into a bowl of cereal. When Liam enters the room Killian looks up, guilt on his face.

"Liam I…"

Liam shakes his head and claps him on the shoulder. "No need Killian. I am sorry. I just wanted to give that Duckling lass something to think about. I thought..."

"That a video made when I was drunk and heartbroken over Milah was the best way to send a message?"

Liam pauses. Killian hasn't breathed her name in almost two years, at least not while sober. Liam hadn't realized the song was about Milah. He hadn't really bothered to watch it. He had seen the title and knowing the song he thought it would be the perfect response to the presumptuous blonde. The last thing he wanted to do was drag up painful memories for his little brother, and Milah was his most painful memory.

Killian had met her at a one of his bar gigs up north. She was working as a waitresses but she wanted to be a singer. She had practically begged Killian to give her a trial. And even though the band didn't really need a back up singer, and she lived too far away to really join the band, Killian had agreed. Liam had never asked Killian why but he suspected that he identified with her feeling of being trapped and her desire to leave her home town and make something of herself. Two days later Killian brought her to the apartment, hauling her bags.

"She needs a place to stay. It's only for a few days until she gets set up somewhere." he had explained

A few days turned into weeks and months. She moved off the couch and into Killian's room after the fourth week. Milah became an integral part of the band, replacing Killian as the lead singer. Not that Killian really minded, her success was his success. They would write songs together and spend weeks on the road trying to build a fan base. It had worked, the band had snagged a meeting with Gold Records. Liam remembers going out to celebrate together, the joy on Killian's face as he threw back a pint and kissed Milah sloppily.

By the end of the month Milah was hauling her own bags down the stairs. It turned out the famous Mr. Gold was only interested in the lead singer, not the band. Liam hadn't asked why Milah getting a contract meant the end of the relationship. He got his answer when a few weeks later she moved in with Mr. Gold. They were together for almost three years. Killian had bought a ring.

After Milah left Killian had quit the band. He didn't perform for months, only playing and singing in his closed room, empty alcohol bottles littering the floor. It hadn't been a pretty sight. Eventually Killian had found his way back to sanity with the help of his brother and friends. He had started booking gigs and making Youtube videos and slowly he rebuilt. Lately Liam had even considered setting him up on a date with one of his friends. Hoping he was ready to move beyond one night stands with women from the bar. He wanted Killian to be happy but instead he had stupidly posted that video and brought him pain.

Liam shook his head and slid into the chair beside Killian. "I thought you were over her little brother."

"I am. I am over Milah." Killian met Liam's eyes firmly and Liam is surprised to find that he believes him. "It's just that video…I was a mess. I don't want anyone to see me like that. But especially not Em…the Ugly Duckling." Killian sighs and runs his hands through his hair, tugging on it before letting go. "It's fine. I took it down. It only had a couple hundred views."

"A couple hundred over night? Bloody hell."

"Well it was morning in the US."

"I'm sorry."

Killian shakes his head. "No it's actually a good thing that I have so many eager subscribers now. You were right, she opened me up to a whole new audience." he gives a small smile and Liam knows he is forgiven. Killian's heart is too big to hold a grudge against someone he loves. Liam stands and heads to the fridge thinking that maybe he would set his brother up on that date. He was ready to move on and he deserved to be happy.

/\/\/\

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**Authors Note: Hey thanks for the follows and favorites guys! Always fun when people want to read the story! Hope you enjoyed this bit. Deciding what to do with Milah and Neal in an AU was fun. The self-defense stuff comes from my own self-defense classes (although I made up the cheesy rhymes). I put a video as an example but seriously Youtube could really use some decent self-defense vids. Also those Youtube comments are almost exact copies of comments on a video of Colin O'Donoghue singing.**

** VidCon in the next chapter! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Youtube playlist is updated. Listen at youtube dot com slash playlist?list=PLWN8Uu8V5RChvSaDEQglOmBy_l1hkfnm8**

Emma tries to watch the "Fuck You" cover again that night but it is no longer available. She has a strong suspicion that Killian hadn't wanted the video posted in the first place and it only makes her feel a stronger kinship with him. Her mind flashes to the video Neal had posted online shortly after he had cut off communication-they had never technically broken up. The situations weren't exactly the same. Killian's video exposed his heart while her video exposed her body.

When Neal had requested a strip tease video she had assumed it was for his own personal pleasure. He was her boyfriend, she loved him and had no reason to question his motives. It had never occurred to her that he would post it to make money; thinking he could capitalize on her Youtube stardom. Of course she hadn't known how deep in debt he was and how afraid he was of his father discovering he had squandered all his college money. She learned all this later after the video was posted, after she (and some dedicated followers) got it taken down, after David-Mary Margaret's boyfriend and her knight in shining armor-had hacked Neal's laptop to wipe the video, after her heart was broken. Learning the reason why Neal had done it hadn't eased the pain or made it any less a violation of privacy.

Realizing that Killian and her might have more than a few things in common makes Emma feel guilty. Anna had accused her of being angry and personally attacking him. Emma was starting to think she was right. It takes most of the day but she finally decides to make amends. She logs in as Swan, a little too stubborn to reveal herself completely, and leaves another comment. It isn't much, just a reply to his first reply but it is a sincere apology. She doesn't know if he will even see it but she feels better having done it. Before she closes the window she subscribes to his channel.

Emma would never admit it but as the months pass she becomes a genuine fan of his music. Watching each video as soon as they post and usually several times in the first day. When he cuts an EP, a mix of his covers and original songs, she is probably one of the first ones to buy it. She never gets over how intensely attracted she is to him. Every time he smiles into the screen she feels her stomach flip or her chest tighten. She knows she has a full blown fangirl crush when he does a duet with a blonde female Youtuber called "Tinkerbell" and envy flares hot and bright in her chest. It doesn't help that their cover of "This I Promise You" is so heartfelt it almost brings tears to her eyes.

Sometimes Emma wonders if Killian watches her videos. In late April she mentions how much she loves the song "What A Wonderful World" and a week later he posts a cover of it. Emma watches him playing the ukelele in a blue plaid button down with a proud smirk on his face and she actually blushes. When she mentions that she will be in California for a few weeks he posts a mash-up cover of "Isn't She Lovely" and "California Gurls". The tune is stuck in her head for days and makes her grin every time she hears it. Then there is one of his original songs that references a golden haired beauty and Emma fantasizes it is about her and hopes it isn't about "Tinkerbell". He never mentions Ugly Duckling in his videos but the coincidences are striking and Emma can't escape the little voice in her head. A voice that grows louder when he announces that he is going to VidCon just a week after she announced her own attendance.

"Are you excited for Vidcon this year?" Mary Margaret asks one evening when the whole group is out to dinner.

"Yeah. It will be exhausting but it's always fun. Meeting other Youtubers and the fans is great." Emma replies eagerly. She misses the look that passes between David and Mary Margaret.

"Anyone in particular you are looking forward to seeing?" Elsa asks and this time Emma hears the note of curiosity. She glances up from her plate suspiciously.

"Why?"

Anna lets out an exaggerated sigh. "Killian. We all want to know if you are going to meet Killian."

"Anna!" Elsa and Mary Margaret chorus as Kris and David chuckle.

"What!" Anna protests "We all know you have a gigantic crush on him. And who can blame you, he is dead sexy."

"I am right here!" Kris proclaims with mock affront but Anna just keeps talking.

"And he will be at Vidcon. Don't look so surprised we all watch his videos, not that we need to since you ALWAYS have them playing. So are you planning on actually talking to him or what?"

By the time Anna finishes Emma is bright red all the way to the roots of her hair. She thought she had been so careful, she thought nobody had guessed at her embarrassing and complete reversal of feelings toward Killian Jones. She thinks about denying it but when she looks around the table at her friends she finds she desperately wants their advice. She keeps her eyes firmly on the table as the words she has been turning over in her mind come tumbling out.

"I don't know. I mean what would I say? 'Sorry I devoted a whole video to ranting about you. I jumped to conclusions because I have issues trusting men' or maybe 'I love your videos and your music and your accent and maybe you.' I am sure that will go over real well." the laughs of her friends pull her up short. She looks up and shoots them a pleading look. "I'm serious!"

Once they compose themselves her friends actually offer some solid advice. Elsa tells her that the past is in the past. Mary Margaret encourages her to have hope. David reminds her that anything worth having is worth fighting for. Anna enthuses that she thinks Killian could be "the one" and Kris vehemently disagrees. He advises Emma to just be herself and not rush into anything. Not one of them think it is crazy that she likes a man she has never met. And they all agree that he would be crazy not to like her back. By the end of the evening Emma has already started to act on Mary Margaret's advice; she lets a little seed of hope start to grow.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

As Killian walks into the California heat outside the Tom Bradley Terminal at LAX he can't keep the smile from his face. Despite the noise and the jet lag and the long drive to the Anaheim Convention Center he is bouncing in excitement.

The last few months have been a whirlwind. The bump in subscribers from Ugly Duckling was just the beginning. His growing fan base had opened up new and exciting doors; collaborations with other Youtubers, using the Youtube studio in London, recording and selling his EP, a possible tour on the horizon, and now attending VidCon. Killian has to keep reminding himself that this is actually his life now.

He had planned to take the shuttle to Anaheim but he decides to splurge and take a taxi instead. He asks the driver to take him on the scenic route and isn't disappointed as they drive down the Pacific Coast Highway. He stares out at the crowded beaches, the sun glittering in the sunshine, everyone walking around casually in their swimwear. He can't help the lyric that floats through his head

"You could travel the world. But nothing comes close to the golden coast" He smiles thinking of the mash-up he had done with that song after being inspired by Emma's trip. And just like that he is thinking about her and the fact that he might see her, in person, this weekend. His stomach twists uncomfortably at the prospect.

His crush on Ugly Duckling had not disappeared with her rude video; a fact that frustrated Liam. It still hurt that she had misjudged him but the sting of her words had been swallowed up by all the opportunities her video had brought into his life. It also helped that a few months back she had made a video about the perils of assumptions and snap judgements. He knew it wasn't an apology to him but he liked to imagine that it meant she might give him another chance; a chance to do what he wasn't entirely sure.

He wanted to meet her. His aspirations hadn't really gone beyond that simple desire; at least not consciously (his subconscious was a different matter). Killian knew that in the middle of the 20,000 people at VidCon he was unlikely to accidentally run into her. He had said as much to Liam, when he had asked about the possibility of talking to "that ugly lass" (Liam had not completely forgiven Emma).

"Well brother. If you want to meet her I think you should make it happen. Remember a man unwilling to fight for what he wants-"

"Deserves what he gets." Killian finished the phrase with a sigh. "I know brother."

Liam had narrowed his eyes before nodding, ending the conversation. Killian had taken Liam's advice to heart and promised himself he would find a way to talk to her. From her Youtube video he knew what panels she was attending and when her meet and greets were scheduled. Although Killian wanted a more casual encounter he was prepared to stand in line for the chance to have even a short conversation with her.

As the cab pulls up to the Anaheim Hilton Killian runs his hands through his hair, his jet lag starting to hit him. He is already glad that he came a day early. Check-in is relatively painless and he is soon making his way across the airy lobby to the bank of elevators. He stops next to a tall brunette with bright red highlights in her hair, her face buried in her phone, headphones in her ears. She barely looks up when the doors open and they shuffle inside.

As the doors start to close a voice calls. "Wait!" and an arm shoots through the gap. The doors slide back open to reveal Emma, the Ugly Duckling herself, rifling through her purse. She is even more breathtaking in person and Killian feels the air evaporate around him and his body temperature spike. But before she can look up from her purse, before he can try to make eye contact, or even think of something clever to say, the brunette lets out a squeal.

"Oh my God you are Killian Jones!" The girl practically shouts. Killian feels his cheeks flush with embarrassment and from the corner of his eye he sees Emma's head jerk up in surprise. "I love your music!" She yanks out one of her earbuds and holds it up to him, stepping closer. He can hear his own song, the song he wrote about Emma, floating out. "This song is basically on repeat in my head." the girl's voice settles to a normal volume with her headphones out.

Killian gives her a smile. "Thanks lass. That is my favorite too." he doesn't really know what else to say.

"I'm Ruby by the way. I make videos. Duh, right, it's Vidcon! You probably haven't seen any of them. They are all about relationship and dating advice. Stuff you probably don't need help with. I saw the hot collab you did with Tinkerbell." She talks fast and punctuates her words with her hands.

"Well…" He casts a side glance at Emma. She is intently focusing on her phone, no doubt trying to ignore the whole conversation.

"Can I get a photo?" she holds up her phone and Killian can only nod. His brain still not able to catch up with the situation. Ruby turns to Emma. "Will you take our picture?"

Emma looks up and Killian doesn't think he is imagining a slight flush to her cheeks.

"Oh wow! You're Ugly Duckling!" Ruby's voice rises an octave. "I…you are like my idol. She makes videos too." Ruby turns to explain.

"I know." is all Killian can think to say.

Ruby's gaze bounces between them. "This is already the best VidCon ever!" Emma grins at her enthusiasm and Killian swears the entire elevator grows lighter and warmer. "I want to get a picture with both of you!"

Killian looks at Emma and their eyes meet. There is a pull in his stomach and a strange feeling of familiarity. He has stared at her face a million times but this is the first time she has stared back. He feels paralyzed and is almost glad when Ruby breaks the moment.

"Ok. Get close." Emma and Killian obediently shuffle closer to Ruby and look up into the phone she is holding out. Killian wraps his arm around Ruby's shoulders and his hand brushes Emma's shoulder. They all freeze as the phone flashes. The elevator doors open on Killian's floor and he can't decide if he is relieved or upset.

"My stop." he says as he steps away and grabs his suitcase and guitar case.

"Oh. It was so nice to meet you! I will tweet you the photo!"

"Thanks." Killian says as he runs his hand through his hair and steps out. He turns as the doors begin to close and catches Emma watching him "Hope to see you around." he calls but the doors shut before he can see her reaction.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

As the elevator doors close on Killian Emma lets out a whoosh of breath. She is still in shock at seeing him in person. He is a lot taller than she had expected, his voice somehow deeper, his hair adorably disheveled. He is impossibly more attractive in person than he is on screen. A sentiment Ruby shares as soon as the elevator begins to rise again.

"Oh my God he is so hot. Like ten times hotter in person. How is that possible?" she mock fans herself "Sorry to get all crazy fangirl on you. But you are both so amazing."

Emma smiles. "No it's fine. I totally understand."

"Thanks! I swear I am usually pretty normal. I am just so excited and a little jet lagged. I came all the way from Maine on a cheap flight with a million connections."

"Sounds awful! You know I lived in Maine as a kid." From there the conversation follows the regular path about places they both know, the weather, and things they enjoy about the 'Pine Tree State'. They continue to talk as the doors open and they discover their rooms are only a few doors down from each other. Before they part Ruby invites Emma to join her and some friends for drinks and dinner in a few hours. Emma agrees and Ruby promises to pick her up before she leaves.

Once alone in her room Emma flops face down on her king sized bed and screams into her pillow. She had seen him, breathed the same air, even felt his hand brush her shoulder but she hadn't talked to him. She replays the encounter in her mind. The way he flushed at Ruby's compliments, the way his eyes locked on to hers with an intensity she had never experienced, the way his hand grazed her shoulder and sent a shiver down her spine. But it is his short "I know." when Ruby mentioned her videos that haunts her. Because of course he knew,she had made a whole video mocking him, a video that he probably despised her for making. He certainly hadn't complimented her or been in raptures like Ruby. In fact the more Emma thinks about it the more she wonders if his intense gaze was one of loathing. She replays the scene again and realizes her thoughts are beginning to loop and so with a groan she rolls over and off the bed. She grabs her toiletries from her suitcase and jumps into the rather luxurious shower. She hopes some hot water will clear her head.

Twenty minutes later she is wrapped in a towel rifling through her clothes, and her phone chimes. She checks it and is shocked by her notifications. Elsa and Mary Margaret had both texted and Anna had sent three Snapchats. Emma doesn't open any of them and just calls Anna. Putting it on speaker as she finishes getting ready.

"How did it happen! Tell me everything! Wait I am going to put you on speaker so everyone can hear." Anna screeches into the phone without preamble.

"What are you talking about?"

Emma can practically hear Anna rolling her eyes. "Emmmmaaaa! Don't mess with us! You have been in California for less than 3 hours and you are already taking photos with Killian Jones!"

"How did you-?"

"It's on your twitter!"

Emma launches her twitter app and sure enough right at the top is the photo from the elevator. She pauses to appreciate how good he looks even in bad elevator lighting. His smile seems genuine if a little subdued. Ruby is grinning like a fool and Emma's smile doesn't quite reach her eyes. She groans.

"Are you there? Tell us what happened!" this time it's Mary Margaret demanding. With a sigh Emma launches into her story. When she finishes it's Elsa who speaks first.

"So you didn't even talk to him?"

"What could I say? Plus it was hard to get a word in with Ruby."

"Emma! Emma!" Anna pipes up. "Check his twitter! That Ruby girl just invited him to go out."

Emma looks and sure enough Ruby had tweeted him a second time

" UglyDuckling and a group of us going out. Meet in the lobby in 30?"

Emma feels her breath pick up. She hadn't expected a second chance to come so soon. She certainly hadn't expected that chance to include a whole night of opportunities to talk and get to know him.

"Emma. Please tell me you are going to meet up with them." Anna's voice is a mixture of pleading and scolding.

"Yes. I am going. I am getting ready right now." she snaps.

"Emma." Mary Margaret's gentle voice floats from the speaker. "Don't worry. It is going to be fine. He is going to fall head over heels for you. I know it."

"Thanks." Emma doesn't really feel any better but she appreciates the effort. "I gotta get dressed. I'll call you later."

"You better!" Elsa warns and Emma can almost see her other friends nodding in unison. Emma shakes her head but her heart is glowing with affection for them. Even if she made a fool of herself in front of Killian tonight she knew they would be right there to lift her back up.

She changes her clothes four times, grateful she had let Elsa talk her into bringing extra outfits. ("Believe me Emma there is nothing worse than being stuck in the same dress for days because you didn't bring enough clothes!") She settles on a dark wash pair of jeans and a lacy grey tank top paired with a red leather jacket. She decides to leave her hair down with a slight wave and wear only a little makeup. She is aiming for casual sexy and she feels reasonably satisfied with the results. Ruby knocks on her door just as she is pulling on her shoes.

Ruby is sporting a short black leather skirt, sheer red button up, and a black sun hat Emma wishes she could pull off. They exchange compliments and head for the elevators. Emma doesn't mention Killian but he is her only thought as they drop down to the lobby. Her stomach is in knots but she is determined, no matter what, to actually have a conversation with him.

\/\/

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**Author's Note: So I have never been to Vidcon (but I have stayed in that Hilton a few times). Excuse any inaccuracies. This got long so I broke it up. So this will be a four parter now. Thanks for all the lovely follows, favs, and reviews! **


	4. Chapter 4

When they arrive in the lobby there is already a small group gathered on the chic couches. Emma is looking for Killian's dark head when Ruby squeals.

"Belle!" she rushes over and embraces a short brunette that had detached herself from the group.

Ruby turns her arm still casually slung over her friends shoulders. "Emma. This is Belle she does-"

"Book reviews! I love your channel. You are the reason I gave "Mansfield Park" a chance."

Belle grins up at her "Thank you! Knowing I converted even one person to Fanny Price makes it all worth it! I love your videos too. The one you did about standing up for yourself changed my life." Emma blushes at the compliment.

"God Belle quit being such a fangirl" Ruby mock rolled her eyes as Belle gave her a playful shove."Come on. Let me introduce you to everyone else." Ruby gestures to the group and they walk over.

In quick succession Emma meets Victor, Will, Aurora, Robin, Ella, and August. She smiles and nods but has difficulty retaining any of the details Ruby is excitedly giving. Her mind is too full of dark hair, blue eyes and the words "I know." She positions herself so she can see the elevator doors and every time they open she feels her stomach flip. It feels like only a few minutes before Ruby is checking her phone with a small frown. "Well. We better get going or we will miss our reservation."

Emma checks her phone and realizes that Killian is twenty minutes late. Which could only mean one thing-he wasn't coming. The wave of dejection that sweeps over her takes her by surprise. How could she possibly be this disappointed about not seeing him? She doesn't have time to analyze her feelings as the group heads out into the warm July evening. She looks back one last time at the elevators before completely giving up hope. As they walk to the restaurant Belle falls into step with Emma and returns to the topic of "Mansfield Park". Emma is grateful for the distraction but can't really get into the conversation.

They take over a large table in a relatively quiet corner of a trendy sushi restaurant and Emma ends up next to Will and Aurora and is immediately pulled into a conversation about the pros and cons of viral videos. Usually this is the kind of shop talk that Emma loves having at VidCon and she makes a sincere attempt to participate.

Aurora's channel was about beauty and fashion and she had a small but loyal following that allowed her to keep her channel going. Will's channel was mostly prank and "man on the street" comedy and he bemoaned the lack of consistency in his earnings.

"I basically live off the money from my few viral videos. But I don't bloody know when a video will take off." His thick British accent is a needless reminder of a certain other British vlogger. Emma finds her mind wandering again and loosing the thread of the conversation.

"What do you think?" Aurora asks.

"Sorry what?" Emma shakes her head and shoots the redhead an apologetic smile.

"I was just wondering when you knew you were ready to do Youtube full time?"

"Well actually I am still in school; finishing my Masters in Criminology. Before Youtube the plan was to go into law enforcement. I wanted to help people. But now" Emma shrugs. "With the last Project for Awesome I was able to raise a lot of money for a local woman's shelter and there is just so much potential to help people through my channel and the Youtube community."

"Being selfless is all very lovely but we all got to eat." Will interjected with an eye roll. "I think she was asking how many banknotes were you pulling in when Youtube became your job." The arrival of the waitress prevents Emma from answering and when he leaves Emma is pulled into a conversation with Victor about her format for self-defense videos. He is a health and wellness vlogger but was contemplating adding some instructional exercise videos.

When the food arrives Emma pulls out her phone and surreptitiously checks Twitter. She wanted to properly examine Ruby's invite, she had only spared it a quick glance before. She doesn't know what she is hoping to find as she goes to his feed. She bites her lip at his picture; him grinning into the camera holding up his finger with a heart shaped blister. His latest tweet is a retweet of the photo from the elevator but he added "great meeting you! We should hang out sometime!" Emma guesses that this must have sparked Ruby's invitation. He seemed eager to make friends so why had he not come? She looks at Ruby's tweet again and realizes that she had tagged UglyDuckling. Emma feels the stab of an insidious thought. Had he not come because he knew Emma would be there? She tries to push the thought away and focus on enjoying her California roll. But the idea slowly takes hold and by the time they are ordering dessert she has convinced herself that Killian didn't come because of her. When dinner ends Emma is desperate to be alone with her thoughts.

She begs off joining them at the bar. "I'm just really tired. And I have an early panel in the morning."

It takes some convincing that she is fine on her own and eventually Emma is waving goodbye to everyone on the street. As she walks the short distance back to the hotel Emma feels the burn of tears threatening to spill over. She mentally scolds herself for letting a man she has never met get so throughly under her skin but that doesn't stop a few tears from traitorously escaping.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

It's the ringing of his hotel phone that wakes Killian. With a growl he rolls over and yanks the phone off the hook.

"What?" he grumbles.

"MORNING little brother!" Liam yells, the distance of a continent and an ocean doing little to temper his volume. Killian squints, the lights of the room burning his retinas, and looks at the clock.

"Liam it's nine o'clock at night."

"But five am here!" Liam's cheerfulness in the morning was one of his more disgusting traits. "From the sound of it you arrived safe but jet lagged."

"Mmm-hmmm." Killian yawns.

"Good. Glad you are safe. Go back to sleep." Liam barks the last sentence like an order and then the line goes dead.

After a few attempts Killian manages to get the phone back on the cradle. He throws his arm over his eyes, trying to block out the lights and wondering if he can manage to fall asleep again without having to get up and turn them off. The fragments of his dream are floating just out of reach but he sees a flash of gold hair in his mind and he is reasonably certain that he dreamed of Emma.

After the elevator doors had closed he had found his room and collapsed on his bed with a groan. The first meeting had been a disaster. It had practically not even been a meeting. The only thing that had lifted his spirits was seeing the picture Ruby had posted. Killian had agonized over his response, eventually settling on something friendly but not over eager that opened the door for getting to know each other better-all in 40 characters. The last thing he remembered before jet lag pulled him into sleep was staring at the ceiling contemplating attending Emma's early panel in the morning.

Before he can drift back to sleep his stomach growls and he realizes he had slept through dinner. Conceding defeat he rolls out of the bed and heads for the bathroom. He peels of his clothes, rumpled and reeking from his flight and long nap, and jumps into the shower. The water helps wake him up but he still feels the drag of the time change and he knows that once he eats he will be heading right back to bed. He pulls on his favorite blue plaid button down and tries to tell himself he isn't dressing nice on the off chance that he might run into Emma again. He tucks his phone, wallet and key card into his jeans and heads out.

He is heading for the hotel restaurant, he doesn't have the energy to go anywhere else, when he hears his name.

"Killian!" He turns and is surprised to see Mae, better known as "Tinkerbell" waving at him from across the lobby. He walks toward her with a smile and greets her with a quick hug. Her messy high bun tickling his face.

"Tink! I didn't expect to see you here!" he says.

She shakes her head and smiles. "I told you I was staying here. Where are you off too?"

"Just grabbing some dinner in between naps." He gestures toward the restaurant with a grin.

"Oh. Mind if I join you?"

"Sure I…" Killian trails off as his eyes fall on Emma. She is standing alone just inside the doors and Killian is positive she is staring at him. For a moment he can't breath. He feels an almost physical tug toward her and he actually takes a step before their eyes meet. She has been crying and the thought that she is upset makes him frown. She looks away, lifts her chin higher than normal and strides quickly towards the elevators her hands shoved into the pockets of her leather jacket, pulling it tight around her.

He turns back to Tink. "Sorry. I'll have to take a raincheck." She gives him a surprised look but he doesn't wait to hear her answer. He turns and rushes towards the elevators just as Emma steps into one. She is pounding on the "close door" button when he slips in.

The doors close and Killian slumps against the wall with a grin; they are alone. He clears his throat and says the first thing that comes to his mind.

"So you come here often?" it's a horrible joke and not at all what he imagined his first words to her would be. She doesn't respond, doesn't even look at him. Killian glances at the flashing red numbers as they countdown the precious moments he has with her. He tries again.

"You know most people would find your silence off putting but I love a challenge."

This gets her attention and she turns to him with glittering eyes. Killian has seen enough of her angry rant videos to know that look. She opens her mouth and then closes it. tossing her head and making her curls bounce. "No. You're not worth it." she mutters and looks back at the doors.

And though the elevator is still rising Killian feels like his heart has plummeted back to the lobby. He runs a hand through his still damp hair cursing himself for thinking that she would ever see him as more than a untalented misogynist. The elevator begins to slow and Killian is seized by a sudden panic that this might be the last chance he ever has to talk to her.

The doors slide open and she steps out. He follows as far as the doorway his heart in his throat.

"Emma wait." she stops and turns which is all the encouragement he needs to continue. "I just wanted to say thank you."

"Thank you?"

He nods, pushing the elevator door back as it tries to close on him. "Yeah. For linking to my video. It's changed my life. And uh…" he scratches behind his ear "I know you don't have a high opinion of me and you weren't trying to help me but…well thank you Emma." He has avoided looking at her directly during his speech but as he says her name he locks eyes with her one last time. He feels the doors starting to close again. With nothing more to say and feeling more than a little embarrassed he steps back into the elevator and for the second time that day watches as they close on her.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Emma is rooted in place staring at the elevator doors. The way he said her name echoing in her mind; soft and gentle and a little sad.

When she had walked in to the lobby and seen him hugging 'Tinkerbell' envy had hit her hard and she had realized that there was something worse than thinking that he was avoiding her. Then he had looked at her and frowned and Emma had felt something snap. It was all too much and her anger flared building a wall and protecting her from her other emotions. She had stormed to the elevator eager to get away only to find when she turned around that he was following her. Against her will her heart had stuttered which had only made her angrier. When he had attempted to talk to her she had held on to her anger like a lifeline, stopping just short of being incredibly rude.

When the elevator stopped she had intended on walking away and never looking back but then he had called her name.

Her name. How had he learned her name?

Ruby hadn't said it and she rarely used it in her videos. But somehow he knew it and he used it to get her to stop so he could thank her. The sincere tone of his voice had reminded her of the reverent way he sung a ballad. By the time he said her name again she was no longer angry with him but she was upset with herself. Because how could she have forgotten that he had every reason to think that she disliked him? And then even though she had been nothing but rude he had expressed gratitude. Emma feels a surge of hope and she knows she needs to find him and explain.

She punches the elevator button and it slides open immediately to reveal Killian slumped against the back wall. He looks up in confusion and Emma starts speaking before she loses her nerve.

"I'm sorry Killian. That video was completely out of line. I was angry about something else, about someone else and I took it out on you and well I am sorry for everything I said." At her words the corner of his mouth ticks up in the beginning of a smile.

"So you don't think I am a 'moderately attractive guy singing mediocre covers'?"

There is a change in his inflection and Emma knows that he is quoting her. She winces. "I said that didn't I?" His eyebrows rise and he tilts his head and Emma thinks it is spooky how familiar she is with his facial expressions. "Well I take it back. Your covers are amazing. I think your 'What A Wonderful World' cover is my favorite version."

"You watch my videos." He says with a note of wonder in his voice.

Emma bites her lips and nods. He pushes away from the wall and steps towards her. The doors begin to close again.

"Bloody hell!" He shoves his arm into the gap and the doors bounce back open. Emma can't help the giddy giggle that escapes. Killian smiles back wide and happy as he exits the elevator.

"I accept your apology on one condition." his tone is playful and he bounces on the balls of his feet as he steps closer. Emma arches her eyebrows. "Have dinner with me?"

She doesn't know what she expected but it certainly wasn't an invitation and yet it feels so natural and right that she doesn't think before smiling and nodding. His eyes light up and he turns to punch the elevator button. "Where do you want to go?"

"What now?"

He turns back with a grin "Of course. Isn't your motto to seize the good moments?"

Emma can't hide the surprise from her face because it is her motto but the only way he would know that is if-"You watch my videos?"

He wiggles his eyebrows and shoots her a wink. The same wink that had melted her a hundred times from her laptop screen. In person it is much more powerful and she feels a flush creep up her neck. He steps into the elevator and she follows.

As the elevator descends she can't help casting him sidelong glances. The entire moment feels surreal and she bites her lip hard just to make sure she isn't dreaming. They step off the elevator and practically run into Tinkerbell. The woman looks between them with a sly smile. "So that's why you ran off."

Killian shrugs his shoulders and scratches behind his ear as a blushes creeps up his neck. Emma looks between them envious of their casual banter. Tinkerbell smiles at Emma. "Love your videos. I'm a big fan. Not as big a fan as Killian of course…"

"Tink!" Killian says in a low growl which only makes her laugh.

"All right I'm going." she turns to Emma with a wink. "See ya around."

As she leaves Emma forgets to be jealous; she is too intrigued by this new information. They have just been seated at the hotel restaurant when she turns and asks "So you are a fan of my videos?"

Killian shoots her a wicked smile. "Technically I'm a fan of every part of you."

And it's a simple phrase but it makes her heart race and color rise to her cheeks. She looks away unable to meet his blue eyes.

"Apologies. I probably shouldn't have said that. I know we just met. It's just... I feel like we understand each other." the concern in his voice causes her to look up. She shakes her head and she realizes that she doesn't want to hold anything back from him.

"No. Actually that sort of makes it easier for me to admit that I feel the same way. I mean being a fan and understanding each other and…" Emma feels frustrated at her inability to properly communicate how she feels. So she shows him by reaching across the table and grabbing his hand. It's warm and calloused from playing the guitar and its the first detail about him that she didn't already know from his videos and suddenly she is eager to learn everything else the screen could never teach her.

They get kicked out when the restaurant closes and Emma doesn't know where the time has gone. Their conversation had flowed so easily and seamless that Emma feels like she has known him much longer than a few hours. It's late and they both need their sleep but instead of going to their rooms they relocate to the bar. When they get kicked out of there a few hours later they finally head for the time when they get on they are holding hands and exchanging smiles.

Killian walks her to her door and Emma thanks him for dinner and smiles up at him. He brushes a lock of her hair off her shoulder as his eyes search hers. She leans into him as her hands slide up to grasp his face and pull him to her. She adds the scratch of his beard, the taste of his lips and the sound of his groans to her growing list of discoveries about him. Emma knows they are kissing good night but somehow it feels like hello. They might have kissed much longer but they are interrupted by a wolf whistle.

They break apart panting but smiling and turn to see Ruby standing in the hallway with a large grin on her face.

"Best. VidCon. Ever."

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**Author's Note: Thanks everyone for favoriting, following, and reviewing. It has made writing this little AU so much more enjoyable! I hope the ending brought a smile to your face! **


	5. Epilogue

As Emma looks out over the sea of people gathered to hear Killian perform it doesn't escape her notice that the majority of them are female. As he walks onto the stage and the crowd begins to erupt she feels a sense of pride. He smiles and grins in his adorably awkward way and the screams increase. She smirks. Emma isn't the only one in the audience that finds him incredibly attractive. She feels her jealous streak rise a little when he shoots a wink out into the crowd. But then he looks over to her and gives her a wide smile and she forgets to worry. After all they are just fans and even the biggest fan doesn't know the things she does about him. Like the way he likes to rub circles on the back of her hand with his thumb or that the blue plaid button down he is wearing is his lucky shirt.

Killian adjusts the microphone and the crowd quiets.

"Well thanks for being here! I want to start out with a cover that, I have on very good authority, is one of my best." He turns and picks up a ukelele and Emma smiles. When he start's strumming the opening to "What A Wonderful World" he finds her and winks. She grins back as the crowd spontaneously claps and hoots, she isn't the only one that loves that song.

They have technically only known each other for two days (well 46 hours) but Emma has already looked into buying plane tickets to London. She isn't sure what this thing is with Killian but she knows that she doesn't want to say goodbye tomorrow. She doesn't stop to think about the fact that she has only looked at one-way tickets. Because if she thought about how much she wanted to be with him she just might freak out about how fast all of this was going. It helped that her friends, especially Anna, were completely on board with her last minute trip.

"I mean it's not like you can't make videos in England." Mary Margaret had pointed out.

"And you have the whole summer free." Anna had added.

It goes without saying that Elsa, being the obsessed Jane Austenite of the group, is already planning on joining her.

Emma's biggest concern is that while she is falling hard and fast she isn't sure that Killian feels the same. She knows he likes her but would he be freaked out by her willingness to relocate for the rest of the summer? She had overestimated Neal's feelings and level of commitment, she didn't want to make the same mistake with Killian.

She tries to shelve her worries and enjoy the moment. Killian's set list is amazing and she watches in fascination as he performs. It's her first time seeing him live. She doesn't count the impromptu song he played for her in his room the night before. She can tell he loves being on stage, loves the screams of the crowd and thrill of interacting with them. So she finds it strange when he goes to introduce his last song and started running his hands through his hair; a dead giveaway that he is nervous.

He clears his throat and leans into the mic. "I wanted to end tonight with one of my original songs." He strums the guitar. "I wrote this song this Spring for someone very special that I had never actually met in person." he scratches behind his ear and his eyes search the crowd before finally locking on hers. Her stomach twists with the anticipation of what he is about to say. He gives a small smile and continues. "And amazingly she is here tonight. So Emma, my muse, this song is for you."

The crowd lets out a collective sigh but Emma doesn't really hear them. Killian's words have transported her somewhere else. She is back in her apartment sitting in her bedroom listening to his song and wishing that someday, someone would love her the way Killian Jones seemed to love his "golden haired beauty". She realizes that if anything she might be underestimating Killian's feelings.

She buys her ticket that night.

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**Author's Note: Yes I know I marked this complete. But I tried writing a little snippet for a friends birthday and it ended up at 700 words and I thought I should probably just post it here! **


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